Wants and Problems at Hogwarts
by xnanniax
Summary: MARY SUE WARNNING! How to get everything your heart could ever want at Hogwarts.
1. Chapter 1

**Wants and Problems at Hogwarts**

**********Part of the Story "at Hogwarts" series **

**-in which characters, problems and motives are introduced and dealt with...or Not **

**(somewhat connected to Crimson--done by kira who is almost done writing it...yay!) **

one plus one equals disclaimer. i own nothing in this world...that means good old Harry Potter

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Fitting in at a new school can be hard for everyone, but it can be made more difficult, for instance if you arrive instead of 1st year, fifth or six, or if you are from another part of the world, or if you are changing Wizarding and witchcraft schools.

Unfortunately for Kira, James and Meg, all of the above applied.

Transferring from Canada meant that they did speak the same language, though some conversations with a selected few at Hogwarts lead them to believe otherwise, and since they had already had some schooling in magic, they weren't too far behind.

The major difference that they had noticed was that Hogwarts, for all its wonders, was way stricter then back home.

Where once lighting a persons head on fire only meant you had to apologise and try not to do it again, here it meant detentions and points subtracted and pain lots of pain. The girls were slowly realising that Hogwarts was way more conservative than their old schools.

It was no wonder that in only their first week they were all sent to Dumbledore's office together for a long discussion.

"Candy Apple"

After the ever angry McGonagall left them at the stairs to Dumbledore's office the girls slowly rode the stairs to the top in silence.

None of the, wanted to be kicked out or be in trouble….at least no so early.

"What you guys do?" meg whispered as they entered a large empty room, filled with nothing but books and deranged sculptures.

"Nothing," kira said defensively. "I just hit some kid who was being a douche to me. And I got caught selling."

"selling what?" james asked as she picked up a heavy round object to the dismay f meg.

"just so illegal mind altering substances."

"ohhhh! Where'd you get it?"

"I have my sources. Why meg you interested?"

"just curious."

"I can't believe you two."

"Well miss perfect how did you get here then? I doubt your our escort."

"well, I-"

"she was caught fighting with big head." Meg interrupted.

"Hermione? That tight ass? What where you fighting with her for?"

"nothing…"

"Ron and smarts."

"meg!"

"hey if you don't want the whole school to see you fighting then don't do it at the breakfast table." She said playing with her pigtails.

"I didn't start it!"

"well telling her that her head looked like an explosion sure didn't help the matter."

"I didn't say her head looked like an explosion. I said she was badly groomed."

"even worse," kira chuckled.

"So if kira's here for fighting and drugs, and I'm her for self defence-"

"lighting Hermione's hair on fire while she's unconscious doesn't count as self defence-"

"same thing in my books," kira remarked as she went over to check out the brilliant bird sitting on a desk.

"Then what are you don't here, oh sweet and innocent one who has never gotten in trouble once since I have meet you."

"its easy. I got in trouble from some Prefect for painting one of the walls."

"you've got to be kidding me…"

"it was an ugly colour so I decided to change it to a subtle pinky red colour. Great improvement I say, but the perfect and teacher disagreed. You can do anything at this school."

"what about snape?"

"what about snape?"

"well I hear that your flirtations with him have gone south."

"you had sex with him!" james screeched.

"no, gone south as in not working/ getting me into trouble. God! You smile at a guy and he yells at you for disrupting a class."

"guys-"

"I know!"

"no, I mean guys, I don't want to be kicked out of this school! This is more than my second time getting in trouble, I don't want to be sent home."

"James do you really think Dumbledore would do that?" meg asked in little more than a whisper.

"I don't know."

"I say we bribe him, or threaten him." Kira said proudly.

"Kira! This is Dumbledore. Moral of the moral wise of the wise. He's like today's Merlin."

"your right! Lets get him prostitutes!"

"KIRA!"

"oh I have a plan." Said meg. "just leave it to me."

"with prostitutes?"

"no, no no-"

"Girls what are you three doing here?" the old man said walking in.

"Sir."

"in trouble again you three? How many times this week?"

"At least three," meg cooed, with a large smile.

"meg!" james elbowed her.

"look sir, I'm sure we could come to-" kira started.

"it won't happen-" James pleaded.

"GRANDPA!" meg said suddenly jumping on the old man and giving him a great big neck hug.

"what?" the other three said in disbelief.


	2. Chapter 2

**Wants and Problems at Hogwarts**

**********Part of the Story "at Hogwarts" series **

**-in which characters, problems and motives are introduced and dealt with...or Not **

**(somewhat connected to Crimson--done by kira who is almost done writing it...yay!) **

one plus one equals disclaimer. i own nothing in this world...that means good old Harry Potter

* * *

"grandpa. You know you missed us. Your three only granddaughters."

"Granddaughters?" they all repeated again.

"I know we haven't seen each other in a while, but I never ever thought you would have forgotten about us." She started pouting.

"what is she doing?" james whispered to kira.

"I don't know…"kira answered.

"neither do I." Dumbledore added.

"oh sillies." She lay on her back on the desk. "don't you love us any more. Remember when we were little, and you took us to that duck pond, and James fell in."

"I did not!"

"and then one of them bit her." Added Kira.

"what are you guys talking about?" whined James.

"And then she cried and cried. You little ones were so cute." Dumbledore leaned over and hugged meg.

"then mom moved." Meg said.

"I missed you guys." He sighed.

"But now where at Hogwarts-"

"And we can be a family again!" he cheered.

"OH this is just depressing," james muttered.

"What did she just say?"

"Nothing, nothing," kira led the man from his desk to a window to look about the Hogwarts grounds. "you know sir-I mean grandpa-"

"call me Didi-"

"O..k…Didi-"

"No. Dziadzia ."

"Dziadzia-"

"Or how about Gammlefar! Or Opa! Or Pampo!" he continued to himself.

"Umm-"

"PawPaw! Zeidy! G-Daddy!"

"G-Daddy!" meg cooed at once, running up and hugging him…again.

"how about we just sick to grandpa for grandfather." Kira pleaded.

"can I still call you G-daddy?"

"of course you can sweetie."

"that's beautiful. Guys come on now. Minds moving forward. One direction-"

"my you've grown up, KiKi." He said sitting down on a large chair by the fire place. "I remember when you used to shoot about the place on your highknee." Kira just looked on in horror, this wasn't working. Whatever meg had planed it didn't seem to be working. It was just getting weirder by the minute. And then meg pounced on the poor man…literally.

Jumping on the Dumbledore's lap, the girl just smiled up at him, looking as innocent as the day she slithered out of the snake egg she hatched from. "Dum-Dum-Door?"

"yes sweetie?"

"James and Kira and I are still abit nervous about being here and all, that's why we keep getting in trouble and all. That and I think some of the teachers don't like us."

"that's not true, you three are angles. Why would you think that?"

"well Canada's a bit different than The UK and some of the teachers don't seem to get that. I mean we're all just trying to fit in and we keep getting trouble."

"I'll talk to them."

"Thanks," she smiled. "Oh grampa D?"

"yes?"

"we's were also wondering if you could maybe let us use the Shrieking shack for just a little while. Please. It reminds us so of that tree house you built u at our old house."

"Well I don't know…it's a bit rundown and might not be so safe…"

"Its perfect! Don't worry we'll be so super carful and its just so nice. Pleeeeeease!"

"Okay but I want to put a protection spell on it before you three can uses it.

"thank you!"

"anything this old grandpa can do to help his three favourite granddaughters?"

"well," meg started again, but this time she leaned over to the old man and whispered something in his ear.

Dumbledore looked over at the other two girls, smiled and nodded. Jumping off the old fart, meg gave the man a hug and a peck on the check before rushing over to the others .

"Thanks again, Gramps. You, you really do know how to make a girl feel at home. Thanks." And with that the ever perky meg led the ever confused and mildly disturb kira and James out of the office and down to the hallway.

"I think that went well. Do you?" was all that meg said as she undid her pigtails.


	3. Chapter 3

**Wants and Problems at Hogwarts**

**********Part of the Story "at Hogwarts" series **

**-in which characters, problems and motives are introduced and dealt with...or Not **

**(somewhat connected to Crimson--done by kira who is almost done writing it...yay!) **

one plus one equals disclaimer. i own nothing in this world...that means good old Harry Potter

* * *

"what the fuck was that?" James yelled as soon as the three girls made it to an empty hallway.

"what do you mean?" meg said in defence. She seemed very at easy with her earlier performance.

"we'll," James said rubbing her head. "to begin with, you were practically straddling the old man."

"was not!"

"And what's all this about us being his grandkids?"

"well I just thought that Dumbledore needed so grandkids and I mean you can't really get angry at your own flesh can you?"

"it did work," kira nodded.

"but it was wrong! He's gonna find out. He probably already does. I bet he was just playing along with you, just to see how far you'd go."

"if he was faking it, then why did he give us the shrieking shack?"

"why did you ask for it in the first place?" james shouted.

"I just thought it would be a nice place to hang out." This was when meg really started to pout. "I mean I just though. And besides no ones using it." Kira went over and hugged the girl while james looked on still slightly angry.

"what did you whisper to Dumbledore? I know you did."

"I just asked him for a few favours."

"like…"

"well an unlimited supply of candy and coke for you…not that you'd ever want that." She said sarcastically and smiled when James come over, going the love hug. "And for kira, an assistance position for D.A."

"Yay!" kira cheered.

"hey I wanted that job, why didn't you get me that?"

"Hay is for horses James."

"MEG!"

"I love you?" Again with smiles. Again with hugs. "I gotta go."

"where?" kira asked. "its Saturday."

"I have tp work on my award winning homework for Potions."

"I thought you were going to play the 'I'm failing. Please help me' card."

"oh I still am. I asked Dumbledore so set me up with remedial lessons with Snape, however, I want him to see that I do have a brain that works. I may not be good at making potions, but I am good at writing about them."

"great grammar there meg."

"thanks"

"you know your much more evil than I thought you were meg." Kira said lifting one of her eyebrows.

"thanks?"

"is that all you say?"

"only when I'm thankful. Mkay I'm going. Ciao!" with this she left the two girls, heading towards the dorms.

"what are we going to do with a potentially haunted old mouldy rundown shack?"

"can anyone say RAVE!" kira smiled "I'm going to make so much money with this new amenity!"

"I can't believe the great and wise Dumbledore fell for that. God!"

"no man can withstand the awesome power that is megs boob pout!"

"oh god…"


	4. Chapter 4

**Wants and Problems at Hogwarts**

**********Part of the Story "at Hogwarts" series **

**-in which characters, problems and motives are introduced and dealt with...or Not **

**(somewhat connected to Crimson--done by kira who is almost done writing it...yay!) **

one plus one equals disclaimer. i own nothing in this world...that means good old Harry Potter

* * *

Most people think that the headmaster learning of new relatives, would put the whole school in a good and happy mood the next morning at breakfast, but this was not so.

The next morning in between his looped fruit cereal and his Ovaltein soup, Dumbledore was rudely interrupted by his most moody of staff.

"Headmaster, you can't be serious. This letter you've sent the staff…its, its ridiculous!"

"Come now Severus, with the amount of children who are allergic in someway with Doby's cooking it seems most evident that we take him off the kitchen staff and put him-"

"I'm not referring to that letter sir," he slammed the piece of paper that he had been wilding about, next to the cereal bowl. "the one you sent out this morning. The one about those transfer student being your grandchildren and getting special privileges."

"well its true my good fellow." He smiled at the man and then looked over to the Gryffindor table, letting milk dribble from his chin. "My family has come back to me. Its beautiful."

"their not your family. You don't even have children. You were never married!"

"well those little ones are the grand kids he never had. I always wanted grandkids, just like I always wanted kids."

"you're an idiot." Snape muttered under his breath.

"what was that?"

"you're an idiot sir."

"well no ones perfect. Hey, is that mail! Excellent I was running low."

"what?"

just then over a hundred owls flew down from the windows to find their owners and deliver their mail. Three large barn owls headed towards the teachers table pulling a large white box below them.

"what?" snape repeated and the old man gleefully ripped open the box, shooing the birds and digging in. "are those pant chips?"

"it's a muggle candy severus. You should try some. But your own. Theses are mine."

"no I mean are those actual lead paint chips? Where did you get that box?"

"its sent to me. Every week a nice fellow sends me a large box to me for free. Very nice of him."

"who?" snape said leaning over to lift the flap of the box to look at the return address, but be fore he could Dumbledore started to growl at him. "Relax I'm not going to steal them, I just want to see whose sending them to you. Mr. D.L.V….you know you're a complete idiot. I really don't see how your headmaster to Hogwarts or even how your still alive."

"Mr. D.L.V. is ever so nice. I really must send him a gift basket one of theses days."

"your bleeding from your mouth."

"oh so I am. Oh those smuggles and their candy. Their delicious, delicious candy. Makes me want to hunt down and eat all of their children-"

"Headmaster about this letter. You're practically giving theses runts a card Blanc. They almost have complete rule of the school."

"oh my little ones. They're such sweeties. Oh that reminds me Severus," the old man said in between bits of paint. "I want all my grandkids to do well at Hogwarts, in everyway. I understand that meg is isn't doing well in your class."

"Let's just say that her mind drifts." He said glancing down at the Gryffindor table. Kira, James and meg were enjoying their breakfast in between laughing, giggling and smiling. The sight of this for some reason made the man feel embarrassed and he quickly looked away at the floor when. _Stupid girls_, he thought. _Stupid meg_.

"well we can't have any of that. I want her succeed, and if that means extra classes, then so be it."

"you've got to be kidding me. I don't do extra classes. For anyone."

"severus, she's family."

"not for me, not for you."

"your being a pooh."

"well you're a douche. I don't see your point." This is when Dumbledore started to pout. Whether or not he had picked it up from a certain 'granddaughter' is unknown. "That's not going to work. You look like a run over, very ugly pruned baby."

"please…"

"No!"

"good morning Headmaster. Good morning professor." The three girls said as they walked by the large staff table and out of the great hall. They were met by a wave from 'Gramps' and gawking from the professor.

"You know you don't have a choice in the matter." Dumbledore said offering some paint chips to Snape.

"I know, I know." Instead of taking the chips he grabbed the flask from Professor Trelawney taking a deep gulp before slipping back into her coat pocket. "I know."

END


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